Jason's birthday...

Today, Jason would have turned 28 years old. By now, he would have been married to Lindsay for almost two years. It breaks my heart that they never got to walk down that aisle... yet there is a sweetness to knowing that they are both in heaven together.

I wish that I would have kept in better touch with Jason while he was still alive. That is something I think about often. I feel like I sort of don't have the "right" to be so affected by his and Lindsay's deaths because I wasn't as close to him at the time of his death as I once was... when we grew up together. But their tragic deaths truly have had a tremendous impact on me. I cannot possibly look at the world in the same way anymore. But I'm glad that God has not allowed me to be bitter. In fact, this whole ordeal has really made me appreciate what is most important... Jesus, Salvation, family, friends, loved ones, etc.... and it has made abundantly clear what is not at all important. And when all is said and done... I am so grateful to God for the HOPE that He gives us, as believers. We know that the loss and the grief is not everlasting... and the goodbyes are not forever... because Jesus paved the Way for us to see each other again. Praise God!!!

♥ ♥ ♥ ♥ ♥

Happy birthday, Jason... you are dearly missed. I pray for your family every day and I look forward to seeing you, and getting to know Lindsay, when I finally come Home.

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These lyrics are so appropriate for how we all view what happened. None of us ever imagined something like this could be possible... but we found out the hard way that we are not immune. Yet there is amazing comfort in knowing that Jason & Lindsay are in heaven... and that we will get to see them again someday.

"With Hope" by Steven Curtis Chapman

This is not at all How we thought it was supposed to be We had so many plans for you We had so many dreams And now you've gone away And left us with the memories of your smile And nothing we can say And nothing we can do Can take away the pain The pain of losing you, but ... We can cry with hope We can say goodbye with hope 'Cause we know our goodbye is not the end, And we can grieve with hope 'Cause we believe with hope (There's a place by God's grace) There's a place where we'll see your face again And never have I known Anything so hard to understand And never have I questioned more The wisdom of God's plan But through the cloud of tears I see the Father's smile and say well done And I imagine you Where you wanted most to be Seeing all your dreams come true 'Cause now you're home And now you're free, and ... We can cry with hope We can say goodbye with hope 'Cause we know our goodbye is not the end, And we can grieve with hope 'Cause we believe with hope (There's a place by God's grace) There's a place where we'll see your face again We have this hope as an anchor 'Cause we believe that everything God promised us is true, so ... We can cry with hope We can say goodbye with hope 'Cause we know our goodbye is not the end, And we can grieve with hope 'Cause we believe with hope (There's a place by God's grace) There's a place where we'll see your face again...

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Me & Jason at age 2.