Jason's 36th Birthday!

Jason in Puerto Rico, 2004

Today, Jason would have turned 36 years old. He was 26 when he died. Can it really be that a decade has almost passed since he and Lindsay were killed? Sometimes it seems like eons ago, but most of the time, I remember it as if it was only about a year ago. My memories of those days (the "aftermath" rollercoaster of emotions) are so vivid... which is kind of strange, because at the time, I felt numb. But I remember that feeling. I was in total shock. I could not grasp the reality that someone I knew as a best friend throughout so many years of my life was murdered. Murdered? I never imagined something like this could hit so close to home. I didn't even know what to do with myself. My own little world didn't make sense anymore. The equilibrium was shaken like a snow globe and nothing would ever be the same. In some ways, that's a good thing. I will never look at life the same way again, because now I realize that life could end in an instant, and I also know how real and tangible God is when you need Him the most!

Natalie Grant (excerpt from her beautiful song, "Held") "This is what it means to be held How it feels, when the sacred is torn from your life And you survive This is what it is to be loved And to know that the promise was that when everything fell We'd be held"

God changed my perspective on EVERYTHING. I am so grateful to Him for not letting this tragedy destroy us. He brought beauty out of the ashes. That doesn't bring Jason & Lindsay back, but it does give us so much HOPE that He loves us more than we can possibly imagine and we can trust and believe in His promises! We WILL see them again in heaven!

"And now, dear brothers and sisters, we want you to know what will happen to the believers who have died so you will not grieve like people who have no hope. For since we believe that Jesus died and was raised to life again, we also believe that when Jesus returns, God will bring back with Him the believers who have died. We tell you this directly from the Lord: We who are still living when the Lord returns will not meet Him ahead of those who have died. For the Lord Himself will come down from heaven with a commanding shout, with the voice of the archangel, and with the trumpet call of God. First, the Christians who have died will rise from their graves. Then, together with them, we who are still alive and remain on the earth will be caught up in the clouds to meet the Lord in the air. Then we will be with the Lord forever. So encourage each other with these words."
~1 Thessalonians 4:13-18

"Be strong and courageous. Do not be afraid or terrified because of them, for the Lord your God goes with you; He will never leave you nor forsake you."
~Deuteronomy 31:6

"Yea, though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death, I will fear no evil; For You are with me."
~Psalm 23:4a

Today, I remember Jason and think about his sense of humor and his sense of adventure. He was not at all materialistic. He found his perfect match in Lindsay because she was the same way. Jason loved the Lord, he loved his family, he loved people and he loved nature. He was an amazing person, loved and missed by many, and I can't wait to see him again in heaven someday! That is no lofty thought. Heaven is a heartbeat away and is as real as the world around you!

Happy Birthday Jason! You will never be forgotten! I continue to pray and never give up hope that there will be justice for you & Lindsay someday soon!

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To those who read this, if you don't know God and/or don't believe in Him for one reason or another... there IS a way to find out that He is real. I know that many people who don't believe simply don't know HOW you can know for sure. Others outright deny He exists and they think believers are crazy for believing in a Holy God that we can't see. But just like you can't see the wind, you can see and feel the effects of the wind! And if you want to know whether or not God exists, all you need to do is seek Him with a sincere heart and you WILL find Him:

"I love those who love Me, and those who seek Me find Me."
~Proverbs 8:17

"But if from there you seek the Lord your God, you will find Him if you seek Him with all your heart and with all your soul."
~Deuteronomy 4:29

"You will seek Me and find Me when you seek Me with all your heart."
~Jeremiah 29:13